Sometimes as a writer, you think you should really know everything on the matter your writing, otherwise you’re a fake! Well for me, I’ve chosen a really simple topic, Love. Yah right! Love is a very complicated topic, because it’s story never and I mean never…plays out the same for its characters.
So when it comes to the subject matter of Love, simple is the last thing that comes to many of our minds. However, you’ll find the ones who seem to think they know everything, so much so, that they never ask for help. They’re the ones who will say “Yah, I know, I’ve got it, I’m good.”.. just as you watch their marriage, relationship, dating life, fall to pieces.
I remember watching this married couple who were having major problems. A person came into their path, proposed that there was a problem and that they should look into doing something about it. Primarily the husband. The wife at the time was open to getting counsel, the husband however, was convinced that they didn’t need any help, or suggestions for that matter. If I told you their marriage fell apart and they’re no longer married, would you be surprised? Well you shouldn’t, because that’s exactly what happened.
Ego gives the illusion of being a grand friend, until your world falls apart and your former friend is no longer anywhere to be found to hold accountability. Having an arrogant, I know it all mentality, is one of the biggest roadblocks that will keep you from getting what you truly want.
I once had a reader write in and question who I was to be writing on this topic, what were my credentials and where did I get my degree? They then went on to say that my advice was so general that it could be found at any Barnes and Noble. The old Arica wanted to say “Go F$&# yourself and I trust you’ll be a lonely bastard for the rest of your life!” I didn’t say it, though everything in me wanted to. This person caught me at one of the most difficult times in my life with my sisters situation and being in California, away from my family in Texas. So in my opinion, I wouldn’t have been totally in the wrong… but I opted out of my old antiquated ways and said something along the lines of, if my site’s not helpful then they should stick with their Barnes and Noble advice.
We had a banter back and forth, however what I saw was someone who wasn’t looking for answers, they wanted someone to blame. Unfortunately, their timing was off as I typically wouldn’t have felt so emotional over being dug at, but thankfully I had friends who helped patch me back together. However I would like to say “A$$hole.. be careful when you want to have a poop fest on people, because you never know what that person is going through!” Okay..its off my chest! Finally! (Hey, its my site, I can do whatever I want!… well sort of!)
Point is, shutting off, thinking you have the resolve i.e… I can find everything at Barnes and Noble, I don’t need a counselor, I’m good No thanks, attitude, in that state, you have shut yourself off from ever getting answers. You have taken the doors to your heart and mind and have slammed them shut. The problem is, the Universe see’s that and says “Oh, you’re good, guess you won’t be needing my help.” and you’re left with you, your situation and NO answer.
We all must be willing to keep ourselves open, realizing that we all have much to learn. I am constantly learning, I read books, I listen to people’s stories, I watch, I learn. If I don’t know I ask questions. And…rather than just reading about Love, I actively participate with it. I realize that I by no means know everything. I’ve met people who are far more educated and successful in this topic of Love. But I have my own journey, my own story to tell, I’m here to share and help others along the way as I’m privileged to do so.
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