The other day while driving to work the thought crossed my mind “Loving myself, wow I wasn’t taught that?” Okay yes my parents and others taught me about love, but as far as the importance of loving myself, that in itself was a foreign concept. I grew up in a strong Christian home so there were two major things I learned. Love God and love people. Makes sense, but there was something major missing. I wasn’t taught that loving myself would be huge and instrumental if I were going to be able to love others as well.
Later in life I was taught by a very wise mentor and counselor that “you can’t give out what you don’t have.” So while loving other people is incredibly important, the bottom line is I could never really love them well if I wasn’t actually empowered to love myself. Enter adulthood and being in an intimate relationship did the concept really make sense. Well let me take that back, after the intimate relationship with lots of bangs, bumps and bruises did it finally resonate “Oh my gosh I really do have to love myself.”
It is still a lesson I’m learning. Yes I write about it, but the application is whats most important. But often I get distracted, busy with life and on the go until I find myself running on “E” screaming out to the world “Umm hello, love me!!!”, forgetting that the gift I seek is lying within myself. I actually have the power, the gift to love myself. And God? Well I’ve learned that it’s huge to Him as well that I really learn to love myself well.
I’m a great hugger, my touch is pretty incredible as I’m a very compassionate person. But while I can put my hands on the world and exude my love all over those in it, what’s the point if I don’t ever take the time to do the same for myself? I’m learning to remind myself to extend to me the same courtesy, so those amazing arm rubs, running the fingers through the hair, well yes, I have to remind myself to share those same touches with myself.
I’m a lover, I love love. I’m in love with love. I loooooove being loved. I loved being understood (that’s for another day). So while I want to share that love, the woman that I see in the mirror who loves to be loved well, must constantly be reminded that she too can love herself and love herself well. ”Wow I wasn’t taught that”, but the school of hard knocks has shown me this is a lesson that must be applied and applied liberally.