Nothing says “Hey let’s stay here in the friend zone forever”, like staying in the friend zone forever. For most guys this is their worst nightmare. A guy meets a woman he’s interested in, they hang out, they spend time together and all seems well. They workout, they go out to eat, they watch movies and do all the things that most couples normally would do.
Most things, minus the one thing that makes them a couple and no longer just friends. Intimacy is introduced. For some women they like this comfort zone and if there’s no upfront conversation to be had, there are some women who will
coast in this grey area for ages. It’s not until the guy makes the first move or has the honest heart to heart with them, are they ready to be truthful.
So how do you avoid it, how do you avoid staying in the friend zone, sharing in all the same activities that most couples share in, all except for the one you’d particularly like to explore? Now before you become jaded and think that the other person is all about using you, getting yourself in this friend trap or thinking that no one is ever interested in you, there are some things you can do to be proactive.
First off, it’s called contact. I have girlfriends and I have guy friends. The amount of physical contact we have is very limited based upon the sort of contact I would have with someone I’m in an intimate relationship with. To clear the air here, when talking about intimacy we’re talking about kissing on the mouth and everything that proceeds from there.
My girlfriends and I don’t kiss, their tongues never touch me and we typically stop at holding hands or hugging. The same goes for my guy friends, sure I’ll kiss them on the cheek, put my arm around them, what have you, but there are lines we just don’t cross.
Guys, women, when you’re trying to engage someone beyond friendship there are lines that WILL need to be crossed. You can’t be chicken and avoid them. Subtle things like putting your hand on her/his knee. Brushing their hair from their face, frequent kisses to the cheek and kissing on the lips will be required.
You can’t have expectations hiding out in that mind of yours, but then lack the courage to act out on them or even discuss them. It just doesn’t work like that. Chances are if you’re always staying in the “friend zone”, it’s because you’re doing a whole lot of hiding and giving very little action.