One thing that’s nice about the Holidays is that people tend to be a bit more nice. Being kind, joyful, pleasant really aren’t too much to ask for from one another, but for some it’s like pulling teeth. So while people are in the “nice zone”, why not take advantage of it and mimic what you see others doing, if you tend to be the Scrooge type?
Especially when it comes to dating, this is such simple advice, yet it can be challenging to find in the single world. Being nice really pays off, but when you’re chewing on the bitter bug (…gross), its the one thing that pushes others away and you can forget your chances of meeting someone. People who are determined to remain scornful and bitter can count on a life of singleness and loneliness for that matter.
Several years ago while out with the girls in Santa Monica, I remember meeting a pretty good looking guy, so I thought “Hmmm, this could be some interesting potential.” As we sat and chatted, bitterness and cynicism seemed to just spew out of this guys mouth. What went from a hot guy wearing a sports coat oh so well, gradually became the nagging, whiner who I just wanted to disappear. Eventually he did. His rudeness and bitter attitude made him incredibly unattractive.
However, when you meet someone who’s kind, enjoyable to be around, even if he or she isn’t a 10, just their positive energy makes you want to stick around for more. I remember there was another guy whom I would date from time to time, who had the best outlook on life. He was full energy and had quite the adventurous spirit. Needless to say, I looked forward to going on dates with him, every time I’d see him out, I’d light up like a Christmas tree because he was just that much fun to be around!
Ladies, men….if you’re the scorned type running around growling with your sharp teeth, retire that look, it’s not serving you one bit. Ladies its not sexy when you snap at men, showing the bitter bug stuck in your teeth. Men, if you’ve been hurt and are now scorned, being condescending to women doesn’t make you sexy..it makes you an asshole. Especially if you’re trying to meet someone around the Holidays, give it up, its not benefitting you so stop.
Think of a candy cane, they’re sweet and they come with a hook! When out mingling with the opposite sex, keep in mind that your sweetness will hook them in each and every time. Genuine sweetness, not the slimy stuff. I don’t care if you have to pack a mini candy cane in your pocket or purse, whatever it takes to keep you giving off the scorned, bitter bite, just do it!
Simplicity sometimes is the best thing, so if you’ve found yourself with more questions then answers in dating, go back to the basics. Like kindness, smiling and being pleasant to be around. And when all else fails, hold on to your candy cane!