Newly single and very much heartbroken, I somehow mustered the courage to get myself back into the dating world.
My first couple of attempts ended like a bad movie gone horribly wrong. As to be expected being freshly heart broken and back on the market.
However over time, I was able to regain my dating strut and began to have fun with it again.
I mean Hellloooooo this is why I became I dating coach! One because I love it and two because I’m so damn good at it. (It helps if you really like and are into people.. there’s your clue.)
But what followed shocked me.
I got introduced to the world of butt hurt.
Butt hurt? What the heck is butt hurt?
It was a phrase my girlfriend taught me and one that has stayed dear to my heart. I still smile thinking back on the day that she educated me on this term.
Being the straight shooter that I am, if a date didn’t work out or if I saw the guy wasn’t the right fit, I politely told him my thoughts and carried on.
Seemed appropriate, only until it backfired on me.
A couple of the guys actually snapped at me, got rude with me and quit speaking to me altogether.
That’s when I learned butt hurt.
My girlfriend giggled and she said “Oh Arica don’t take it personally, they’re just butt hurt.”
“What’s that?” I replied.
“Oh it’s when a guy gets his feeling hurt and he doesn’t know how to express himself. He just gets butt hurt that’s all”, she explained.
“Oh wow, well okay, now that I know what I’m dealing with, I’ll do my best to stay away from this group of bungholio’s foooorrreverrrrrr.” (that’s a Beavis and Butthead expression in case you didn’t know.)
Now you may think I’m being silly about this whole butt hurt thing, but it’s something that most women and I pay attention to.
I want you to be able to avoid this.
Instead of holding unforgiveness towards your ex, your mom and the last woman that rejected you, let that stuff go!
I’m serious, the more you hold on to it, the more you become prone to being that butt hurt guy.
The more of the butt hurt guy you allow yourself to be, the more women will feel less inclined to open up to you and be around you for that matter.
When I hear that a guy doesn’t talk to his ex anymore, has a bad relationship with his mom or starts dishing out on why women are so overly materialistic or what have you.. it’s a tell tell sign that I’m dealing with a butt hurt guy and he’ll be quite the handful.
Most of the time I don’t want to take him on as a client because I know that unforgiveness will keep him trapped and no amount of coaching in the world will free him as long as he chooses to stay imprisoned by it.
In the words of the Disney Frozen song, “Let it go!”
No really, let it go man.
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