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Most singles see the holiday as a threat.

As soon as you get home, you're going to hear "So why haven't you found someone yet?"

Lord knows the suffer a single has to endure just watching holiday movies alone, not to mention all of the couples wandering around cuddling and holding hands.

I mean yuck, were all the rooms at the Waldorf booked that they have to do this in public?

And what about all the engagement pictures?  Well perhaps as a guy you're thinking instead of buying a diamond, you get to keep that money and buy all the booze you want.

Merry Christmas dollface!

Let me just say what an honor it is to be able to have you here and to be able to share my life and words with you.

I want to encourage you this holiday season to remember that no matter where you are in your quest for love, that most importantly you understand that You are Loved.

That's right.  I don't want you to be overly focused on finding someone that you neglect yourself.

You are most valuable.

You are most worthy of love.

I think until the ends of time, this question will remain to be a valid one.

What do women want?

Let me share with you the challenge with this particular question.

Assumption.

Plenty of times, when I'm working with single men, they come with these ideas and so called "truths" that they are convinced of what women want.

Unless you've been living under a rock, then you're probably all too aware that there's a new Star Wars movie out right now.

And just in case you're a Star Wars fanatic and have yet to see the movie, no I will not be giving any spoilers in this, so feel free to keep reading.

Has it ever occurred to you that Star Wars can be a lot like dating?

Despite all of the pep talks and positive Instagram quotes you read, sometimes waiting to find the person of your dreams gets tiring.

​When you want something so badly and it feels like it's far out of your reach the only thing that seems like your companion is disappointment.

Let me encourage you with this.

Perhaps by now you've discovered that the man who dresses himself in confidence is the epitome of sexiness to a woman.

Anytime you meet a guy who's snagged a hot girl or one out of his league, I can assure you it's an issue of confidence.  

But how do these guys do it?  How do they build such confidence in themselves that even the hottest of women are drawn to them.

Have you ever listened to the song "Santa Baby"?  I listened to it this morning whilst driving the streets of LA and while I listened to it I thought, "Man this lady wants a lot!"

Naturally I chuckled, but then I thought about the single guys I work with and realized that in some of your minds, you actually are convinced that every woman wants this.

While all the things she mentions are wonderful nice-to-have's, the truth is there is something that women want that you want as well.

Single men dating... or NOT.

Whenever I'm talking about dating, a lot of my single men (yes they are all MINE), say "Arica if I could just go on a date that would be phenomenal."

So let me ask you, when's the last time you've been on a date?

For some men, it's been quite some time.  And with the men who haven't dated in a while, I'll often hear them say "I don't have time for those games and bullsh*t."

​Hmmm okay, so how is making out with your video games working for you?

The other day I was talking to a dear friend of mine about men and dating.  He works with a group of men and naturally in their conversations, dating was innately brought up.

Yes even you guys talk like us girls about the ins and out and ups and downs that come with dating.

He was sharing with me that one of the guys was discouraged with one of the girls he was pursuing.  Okay the only girl he was pursuing.

He made his interests known, if I remember correctly, he even went as far as scheduling a coffee date.  But then the ball was dropped.