When we talk about our days as a Single, you’ll normally get two sides of the equation. Those who hate it and those who love it. As a single, I tended to lean more to the loving it side, as opposed to dreading it with great despair. So do you find yourself as a Single right now? Are you loving it, or is it one of those seasons that you wish would hurry up and pass so that you can be happy again?
Here’s something that you may be shocked to hear… it’s what you make it! Like you’ve never heard that before, right? Listen, it’s a solid truth, even though in the midst of singleness you may not want to hear it, it will in the end provide you with enjoying life and taking full advantage of the moments at hand.
Grant it, while going through the single times, I can’t say that I always felt that way. Before I go into the whole “chin up” bit, let me share a time where I didn’t necessarily feel this way, hopefully you won’t feel alone.
As a single in girl in Lala L.A., I was having the time of my life dating and dating lots for that matter. It was always fun to come in from another eventful date and share with my roomie, the delicious details. Over time though, things began to feel a bit funny and quite different. While I was wondering around in my pjs, from being out too late from the night before, of course over a date, my roommate and her long term boyfriend would be heading out the door to do brunch with friends.
Well one day, Singleness caught up with me and when they headed out the door for one of their “couple days”, as soon as that door closed…I bursted into tears. Fun, eventful dates, were no longer cutting it, I wanted something meaningful. I decided to change things up and over time, found myself in a relationship.
Okay here’s where the “chin up” part comes in. The relationship I found myself in, a year and a half later, I found myself out of it. “What??? Are you kidding? Single again? Is this a joke?” Well it wasn’t, while I thought I’d be walking down the aisle of matrimony…I found the aisle to be titled “Single and Lonely”.
Rather than wasting my life away getting back into my previous routine, a merry go round of meaningless dates, I decided to change it up. That is after I had my close friends rally around me and support me, otherwise without them, I probably would’ve gone back to my old tricks. Instead, I thought I’d do some self cleaning and healing. I went to some very trusted inner circle kind of people and got some good ole fashion “counseling/coaching” sessions!
Not really how I pictured Singleness, but I knew that attracting what I really wanted, meant I had to be who I really wanted to be. For me that road would need some direction, from the help of others.
In the midst of my journey, I developed many deep, meaningful friendships and shared some amazing quality time moments, with each of them. Now if I told you I did it perfectly, I’d be lieing! I’m Hispanic and European…which means that God gave me lips that need good kissing!! So I definitely had my fun single girl moments and heaven forbid these full lips of mine become parched!
Point is, I maximized my time of Singleness!! I didn’t spend every day looking out the window moping over if and when Prince Charming would come and rescue me. I seized the moment. Passed up on the ghost of ”Victim Thinking” and decided that I would be victorious. Single or in a meaningful relationship.
I’ve done it both ways, the very exciting life of Singleness which consisted of dancing, dating, lots of kissing and a whole lot of craziness! I’ve done the moping around Single lifestyle, but found it didn’t suit my personality. And I’ve done the “Become the Better Me” way of Singleness.
You have this moment. You have this time. So seize it and seize it with all of your heart. Because life can’t wait for your next relationship! Life is here. It’s NOW!